A few months ago my Grandma passed away. She had been in the hospital for a while going through all sorts of treatments, surgeries & diagnosis; it was an emotional rollercoaster for our family. I found out that she had passed at around 6:30am on a Sunday morning. I had just walked through the doors of come2go to get ready for morning worship when my mom called me and gave me the news. After I got off the phone I broke down. A flood of emotions swept over me; sadness, anger, disappointment, confusion. I had really believed that she was going to pull through.

A few hours later I was in the middle of leading worship. I had somehow managed to make it through all my preparation & rehearsal time without another break down. In the middle of our worship time we began singing a song called “Blessed Be Your Name”. I was leading the song just fine until we got to a section with the following lyrics:

You give and take away
You give and take away
My heart will choose to say
Lord, blessed be Your Name

During rehearsal I went right on by these lyrics without a second thought, but when we got to this point during the service I stopped singing. The music continued but I took a step back from the microphone and put my head down. A lot happened in the next few moments. The first thought that came into my head was “Dave, what were you thinking?”. I was the one who chose the songs for that morning. Of all the times to sing this song, this was one of the hardest. I had to stop & think whether or not I was able to sing those lyrics and really mean them. Could I truthfully, with all my heart, bless God’s Name like the song said on the day my Grandma passed away?

As the music continued and I was just staring down at the ground, I was reminded of something that I had believed and even taught many times; God’s worth is never based on my circumstance. When the sun is shining, birds are chirping and I’m skipping down the streets because life is so good, God is worthy of my worship. When it seems like everything around me is falling apart and I’m angry and confused and the uncertainties of life are piled up so high that I can’t tell whether the sun is ever going to break through the clouds, God is worthy of my worship.

Many of us would never say this, but I think a lot of us tend to put God’s worth on a sliding scale; if we’re having a good day, then we echo the psalmist and say “This is the day the LORD has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it!”. But if we’re having a bad day, worship is the last thing we want to participate in. But God is always worthy of our worship no matter what our situation is. He is always merciful & compassionate; He is always forgiving & loving; He is always God.

Many of us are going through tough times right now. Some of us have lost jobs, investments, 401(k)’s, pensions, etc…  Many of us are wondering when the sun is going to start shining again. Remember this, the Son is always shining.; we just have to learn to look through the clouds. Peace comes when we take our eyes off of ourselves and our present circumstances and set them on the only Person Who’s constant and never-changing. It’s then we realize that He does have the whole world in His hands.

So there I was still looking at the ground as the song went on. The few moments seemed like a few hours as I was silently processing the words that I was supposed to be singing. When God brought back to mind these things that I had learned, I picked my head up and continued singing the song. I wish I could tell you that suddenly a ray of light broke through the ceiling and enveloped me while a pure white dove delicately rested on my shoulder as we finished the song, but it didn’t. There’s no big “Tada!” ending except that the truth of who God is and what my response should be was further engraved into my heart.

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